A participant of The Program writes:
Overall, I am experiencing great results. My problem seems to be dinner, when I want to have a bigger meal. Its not what I’m eating, its portion size, and I find when I’m out with my wife and we split a single meal –its great. When I order my own meal I tend to eat more. Also, I’ve learned that I MUST put my entire meal on a plate – and that’s it. If I have “family style” meals, where I can keep digging in, I seem to keep digging in too much.
My response to him:
Most important is that you're identifying the areas that need work such as your dinner meal when you're eating "on your own" . . These are skills you can learn. The first being awareness. . That when with your wife, the amount you eat is enough. . Not small or big but enough. And when you are not with her and eat more it might be more out of boredom or anxiety or any number of things but not hunger because you've proven you don't need as much as you used to eat. You're smaller. Your portions should be smaller too.
The goal is to find ways to cope with the discomfort rather than eating to relieve the discomfort caused by not eating.
You might always ask for an additional plate as soon as a waitperson puts down your entree. Do not pick up utensils (take a deep breath) until food is transferred to your plate; either ask the waitperson (wp) to remove the original plate or to pack it up so you can take it home (and have it two or three days from now (remembering to skip and scatter) . . freezing is best; I don't even take it out of the bag . . just shove it in the freezer). If that is not appropriate then after you've transferred food to your plate (from the serving plate) then build a waterglass/salt&peppershaker/flower/candle wall between you and it.
And c) leave the table 15 minutes into your meal . . find a phone, a bathroom, a front window, a door . . calm yourself down and then when you return ask if you're still hungry? You'll most likely eat two more bites rather than twelve more bites.
And lastly, think about all of these things BEFORE you put your hand on the restaurant door. Remind yourself that you want to weigh _____ pounds. Envision putting food on a second plate. . Consider having an appetizer or two instead of an entree. . Understand that you are a smaller person and you do not need as much food as the bigger you used to eat. Getting used to these things is your goal, to do these things again and again and again and again until the new way becomes the comfortable and preferred way. Repetition is the mother of skill.
These are some of the things you can remind yourself of when you review your notes. . Or, you can read and re-read this email after you've printed it out.
Hope this is helpful.
Enjoy your day,
Onward and downward,